Clarity...

When one goes to get themselves a pair of spectacles, the eye-test consists of lens combinations being changed around depending how clear you can see out of them. Wipers on a windscreen of a car only exist so that when it rains, you can wipe off the distracting droplets and clearly see the road ahead. Concepts aren't understood unless they're crystal clear. Where, I ask, does this lead us? It only leads me to believe that unless and until something doesn't have a certain amount of clarity, it doesn't work for us.

In viewing how clarity makes us more comfortable with the new adjustment we have to make, the concept of clarity is actually, in my understanding, the basis of all human relationships. Unless we're clear about the relationship and what it means to us, we cannot develop the right degree of trust, love, understanding and sacrifice. If I am unclear about where I stand in any bond, I'm not going to be able to do full justice to it or even take it forward from where it is.

Between friends, clarity is what can make them stronger and more together. Between parent and child, the clarity brings them both round to each other's point of view, which is needed because misunderstandings there cause only hurt, and no happiness. Between siblings, its important to be clear about how they are with each other. The reason why my brother and I are as together as we are or understand each other the way we do, is because we both are equally sure of where we stand in each other's lives. Sure we have our altercations, but those also are not without the understanding of where the other person comes from.

Between those in love, it is perhaps the most important thing. I cannot sustain a relationship that is not clearly defined for me. Not saying that everything needs to have boundaries, or demarcations, but everything does need to be clear. It needs to be all there, or not at all. I've had to be in situations where because I wasn't clear in my head about where I wanted to be, the other person and I suffered the consequences because we were not clear about what we wanted, and hence couldn't be fully honest with each other.

A few years after that incident happened [details of which are unimportant], fate played a funny trick and I was in the same situation again. Amazingly enough, I learned that unless I came clean and clearly explained everything that was in my head and heart, I wouldn't get an honest response on the other end. And I did, because I was clear about where I was going which generated a level of trust and acceptance. And I'm glad that it happened the way it did because despite the hurt, I know that I'm not hanging in mid-air, in limbo, without reason enough to believe in any side of the story.

At the end of the day, it is only fair to someone that you are completely clear about your stance. Not stubborn, but clear. Only if someone else can understand your point, can feel what you do, and can see what you see, will they be able to reciprocate. Remember, unless you see the picture clearly, the glasses just aren't right.

=D